If only he had a voice. Well, pen. And some paper.

Dear Dr. Breen,

I am writing to you to complain about my recent trip to City 17. I had been led to believe that the city is the closest thing there is to a capital city these days, but I must inform you that what I encountered fell severely short of my expectations.

Given the general demeanour of the citizen, I can only assume that you have been contacted regarding the somewhat strident approach to security by many of your staff. I must give praise to one Officer Calhoun who made the time to assist someone who was clearly not a local when my other requests for assistance were met with derision and, more often than not, gunfire. Even my attempts at a leisurely boating excursion were hampered not only by your employees excitable trigger-fingers but also artillery fire and air attack support.

I would also like to draw your attention to the frankly appalling levels of civic cleanliness around the streets of City 17. I could not turn a corner without being confronted by headcrabs, zombies or next-to-impassable toxic waste. And that is without even mentioning the barnacles.

Don't even get me started on the barnacles.

All in all, I am bitterly disappointed with the experience I had in City 17. I plan to spend the next leg of my vacation in Ravenholm and I do not intend to return to City 17. If I do, you may expect to feel the full force of my disappointment.

Yours,

Dr. Gordon Freeman.

PS: Good luck with the new bosses, Wallace!